Definition- It is the relationship communication space where two people invite each other to share their subjective worlds and understand the world of the other. It is an invitation to your partner to be with you rather than expect from you. This enables the couple to co-create a new, unique world of their own, with appropriate boundaries to protect the trust and security in the relationship.
I teach couples how to cross the bridge from me to we. With these new learned skills, couples experience a new level of intimacy, problem-solving that effectively dissolves conflict where caring discussions become the norm. It is not how much you love each other, but how much you love each other when you are not getting along.
When speaking and listening skills are developed, the couple then has the best chance of realizing their hopes, wishes and dreams . This process can only happen in the Safe Space. The foundation of the space is based on loving-kindness, self-restarint, respect, commitment, gratitude, appreciation and the dignity of each partner.
Two Other Key Concepts that need to go into this space.:
Emotional Literacy- This means the ability to be aware of our feelings and learn how to process, control and express them in a respectful and caring way. We need to learn how to respond rather than react. We do what does not come naturally and is counter-intuitive.
Relationship Maturity- This means understanding that a relationship is about sharing and giving. It is not about expecting and taking. We realize that we can only grow in relationship to another in order to grow personally. The relationship is then highly valued as that partner becomes irreplaceable. A relationship based on these values, is truly a treasure to be grateful for. Appreciation should be expressed often to your partner for choosing you and choosing to share their life with you. That is the greatest gift we can give to another.